he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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