I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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