he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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