The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
