Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
