She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Randomize