South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize