Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
He told me they were just razor bumps!
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
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