I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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