And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Are my feet made of real feet?
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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