im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
