But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
