Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
it's not cheating when I paid for it
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
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