So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
I'm really busy with my period
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