just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Randomize
