Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(774): View more from Massachusetts

I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.

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(616): View more from Michigan

This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.

Fav 52 2249 10618
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(785): View more from Kansas

coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow

(1-785): View more from Kansas

why would you restrict a girl of that

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(918): View more from Oklahoma

like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.

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(336): View more from North Carolina

All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...

(1-336): View more from North Carolina

Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!

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(407): View more from Florida

SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE

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(918): View more from Oklahoma

Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that

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(651): View more from Minnesota

I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.

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(870): View more from Arkansas

So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up

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