seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize