3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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