I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Randomize