We need to rekindle our bromance
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
