Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Boobs are out for the taking
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
