I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Randomize
