the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize