yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
