is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Everything about him screamed your future.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
