Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
