Sponge bath it is.
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
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