Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
i wish my penis had a tongue
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
