I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
