is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
last night I used snow as a chaser
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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