Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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