I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Randomize
