carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
tonight lets celebrate not being married
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
