mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
i think i have two assholes
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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