she was so not down for the gang bang
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Randomize
