If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
