yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize