More tranny stories later!
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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