You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
Two words: blizzard sex
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
