I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
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