you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize
