The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
