There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
Randomize
