hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize
