If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
Randomize
