Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize