YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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