do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
You dont lie about slip and slides
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Randomize
