He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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