All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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